I stood next to my client’s father at his son’s fall league basketball game last month.
(We’ll call my client “Dr. J.”)
As we quietly watched the game move up and down the court, his dad said matter-of-factly:
“He’s like a different kid.”
We talked about how Dr. J had shifted from focusing on what he couldn’t control to mastering three simple, actionable habits that would make him a better player.
One, making good decisions.
Two, playing with pace.
Three, playing purposeful defense.
His high school coach believes in these same principles — so much so that he memorialized them in a “Style of Play Guide” for the program.
When we began working together in fall 2024, Dr. J was anxious about where he’d fit in.He was frustrated by his role, by unclear communication, and by pretty much everything outside his control.
Our earliest sessions were filled with venting. That went on for months.
But something changed last spring. After a short break from basketball, his focus shifted inward.
He started to buy into the idea of controlling what he could: his effort, his energy, his attitude.
When we reviewed his goals for AAU season, he said he wanted to improve his decision-making.
I explained that good choices come from a calm, present mind — and introduced meditation.
He didn’t (poop) on it.
Then, in May, he fractured a bone in his lower back. I cringed when I heard the news, expecting a setback.
It wasn’t.
Dr. J was frustrated, sure, but steady.
He told me, “I’m going to be watching, like, hours of basketball every day.”
During his recovery, he realized basketball was a big part of his identity — but not all of it.
He accepted that he could still grow even while sidelined.
Acceptance is maturity.
Acceptance is confidence.
And patience is acceptance in action.
By the time he was cleared, he didn’t rush back. He trusted the process.
His dad was right — he was a different kid.
Now, our conversations center on leadership, role acceptance, and consistent growth — not on the coach, communication issues, or teammates.
Those topics still come up, but they no longer define him.
Progress is never a straight line.
But Dr. J’s commitment to shifting his perspective has led to more steps forward than back.
We’ll keep building on that — one play, one moment, one breath at a time.